Daily Archives: May 12, 2020

The People

Letters from Cardiff in lockdown: Melissa Boothman

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Today’s instalment for the Letters from Cardiff in lockdown series comes from Melissa Boothman, owner of Penylan Pantry and the Secret Garden Cafe in Bute Park. We’re looking for your stories, so please contribute to Letters from Cardiff in lockdown! 

Here is my version of lockdown life, from someone who runs a small independent business in the hospitality industry, and employs 17 people.

Wow, where do I start? So far, this whole experience has been a big washing machine of emotions, mainly on spin, then occasionally clicking on to drain, and sometimes pause, pausing in a big puddle of water, still, very still.

Like many I also felt like we are all living in a fictional novel, a dystopian future.

Week 1 (I think). “It’s okay, we’ve got this, together we will be okay”. In this first week, none of us really knew what we were about to fall into. Seeing the news, and how Italy was being struck down with fatality after fatality, we knew it was going to be serious. However, there is this sense of, ‘it’s not happening to us, we won’t get it that bad’ or will we? The unknown set in…….

Within the two businesses, we adapted and put lots of little changes in place. I held a meeting, to put my team’s minds at rest: ‘Your jobs are safe, I will make sure of it’.

I knew we were about to embark on something that none of us had experienced, but I told myself ‘Mel, you’ve got this, you are good with the big stuff, you are good at change and thinking on your feet, it will be okay’.

The team were amazing and took on all these new changes, turning up every day with a smile on their faces, which really helped.

Our local community, our regulars, our customers, came out and showed their support. It was super humbling, grounding and gave me reassurance.

Change was in the air.

Week 2/3 (it’s all becoming blurry). Shit, what is happening?…..okay, stay calm, react, be proactive, adapt, SURVIVE.

I didn’t really stop to think much in this, the second week, my priorities and concerns were of my staff. ‘OK, I need to keep 17 people in a job, and the two businesses alive.’ In the back of my mind, I’m asking myself ‘what’s going to happen to my little businesses?’ Fears of lockdown are looming, thick in the air, a day feels like a week. We are all in fight or flight mode.

I spent the week hastily listening to the news, to a government that were giving vague advice, that were reacting, not being proactive, and with all this vagueness, the week was a flurry of confusion, for us all. I could see it in our customers, in the ambience, the mood, no one knew what to do, how to properly behave, or what was the right and correct thing to do.

This was the week that no support, or clear guidance came from our leaders, which left many of us scared. This was my week of firefighting.

Amongst these emotions, the anxiety, the adapting, the mind whirling with ideas of survival, kindness prevails.

People were opening up, showing vulnerability, coming together, supporting each other, being KIND.

Within both the Pantry and the Secret Garden Cafe we really noticed how everyone had slowed down, how people were calmer, and more patient, the support for independents was amazing to see.

Friday 20th March, our Government finally announces support for workers, promising to keep everyone in a job, and covering wages. This was such a relief, and half the weight of worry off my shoulders (the other half, the future of my businesses still present). However, the government didn’t release any terms of this payout until the following Tuesday. I was checking the government website multiple times a day, waiting for the terms, checking that myself and my team were eligible.

Week 3/4 (Probably, I’ve stopped counting the weeks, it’s purely day by day).

This is the week that I closed both my businesses. I knew it was the right decision, and I knew it was the best thing for me, my team and the safety of our community, but damn it was hard, harder than I’d anticipated, for I did not at any point, in the years I’ve been running my businesses, expect to be closing them through no choice of my own.

They don’t tell you to plan for the world wide spread of a deadly virus when writing your business plan.

I went into the Pantry, and placed a sign in the window, I sat, had a little cry (it was very emotional, which took me by surprise), and locked the door.

That same day, Boris announced lockdown, something we’d all been expecting, and tentatively waiting for.

The next day, we closed down both sites; turning off fridges, cleaning, sorting out perishable stock and talking about the current situation. I had to call all our utility providers, some acted with empathy, and others business as normal – money/profit over people, even during an international pandemic. I sent emails to landlords notifying them of our closure, updates to customers and contacting our suppliers.

A huge outpouring of love came our way via messages, calls, emails, and comments on social media. Thank you, thank you, it really lifted me, I felt and still feel grateful for the community around me, for the people who love and support my businesses, for what the Pantry means to some people.

The weeks that followed… I felt like the rug had been pulled from under my feet, lost, not knowing what to do, and confused. Stay at home they said, but really, there’s a pandemic outside my doors, with people suffering, and I’m supposed to sit at home (this was my internal battle). I felt helpless. I knew I had to stay at home, but my instinct was telling me to get out and help.

I couldn’t stop thinking of all the suffering some people would endure during lockdown, of how COVID-19 had highlighted the huge inequalities in our country, and how the most vulnerable would be hit hardest. With all of this on my mind, I hadn’t properly stopped to think about the virus, and how dangerous it was. I started reading the news again, and realised that this virus has no rules, it can kill young people, and in some cases people with no previous health problems; oh shit.

With this urge to help, the need to be busy, concerns about the virus, business ideas and the need for rest …..

What to actually do whilst in lockdown was very confusing, and felt very unsettling. I certainly had no head space for a new early morning yoga routine, learning a new language or crocheting a blanket for my mum.

I was pulling myself back and forth in many directions. Eventually, I decided, that the Pantry needed to be on pause (in my head), I needed some rest (after six years of very few days off), I wanted to volunteer and help where I could, and restore some balance.

I’ve been keeping in touch with the team, via silly photos, little messages and the occasional Zoom meetings (I find video chat awkward). The next chapter of this situation meant I was even able to see some of the team in the kitchens.

This came about because … my two friends, Kas, founder of Waterloo Teahouses, and Kev from Holy Yolks, started separate initiatives to support our local hospitals, by providing delicious homemade food to NHS staff and key workers (Kev from Holy Yolks is running the Help the Heroes campaign and Kas set up  Feed the Heath). They couldn’t do it alone, and needed some support.

A few of the hospital canteens had closed, making it difficult for staff to access good food whilst on shift, so we (myself and my team) felt we could help out by reopening our kitchens a few days a week, cooking them some good meals, and at the same time show our gratitude.

We also do weekly deliveries of much needed supplies to Cardiff Food Bank, made possible by cash donations from some beautiful people.

I’d found a purpose and a way to help amidst this chaotic time. Even though I was keeping busy, it really helped me to relax and feel more settled about the whole thing. I started to ease into activities that weren’t work, that didn’t revolve around only the businesses. Spending time with my other half, taking walks, foraging, identifying wild plants, listening to the birds, and enjoying a calmer pace.

The calmer pace has given me a little clarity to start thinking about the next phase. Financially we have taken a huge hit, but we are safe and we will be one of the fortunate few that reopen. It will be hard, like starting over a brand new business again with zero cash flow, but lots of business won’t be reopening.

On the day we closed, I stood, alone looking out of the Pantry’s windows, when I realised, let’s fill these windows with hope and sunshine, inspired by the rainbows popping up in everyone’s windows.

The only problem with this idea, is… I can’t draw. But I know just the woman, she’s amazing, kind and very talented; Suzanne Carpenter, one half of @patternistas. I randomly, with no notice, dropped the Pantry keys through her letterbox, gave her the alarm code and planted the seed.

Suzanne asked me if I’d like a message in the window, yes, yes I would, what a great idea, can it be this – What Kind of World would you like to emerge after this crisis is over?

Suzanne did the most amazing job, it’s beautiful.

This is a question that’s been on my mind since it all started.

Positives (there’s no guilt in saying there are some), for me are: I love how little traffic there has been on the roads, resulting in a calmer less rushed atmosphere, better air quality, and less noise pollution. I’ve loved how it’s introduced a simpler way of life, how it’s slowed me down, and how I’ve enjoyed walks, listening to the birds, my garden, cooking at home, regular exercise, regular meals, better sleep, how I’ve reconnected with plants, and my local surroundings. The joy of simple pleasures. I love how Mother Nature has been able to take a big deep breath of clean air, and how we have all had to STOP.

I really hope we can carry some of these new routines into the future. I hope kindness wins, and governments start putting people before money.

I hope we start to live a compatible life side-by-side with nature, and I look forward to reopening the doors to my business with my own lessons learnt.

Love and Peace.

Melissa Boothman is owner of Penylan Pantry & The Secret Garden Cafe. Visit the Penylan Pantry website / Twitter @PenylanPantry / Twitter @secretgardencf.

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The People

Letters from Cardiff in lockdown: Jodie Ashdown

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Today’s instalment for the Letters from Cardiff in lockdown series comes from Jodie Ashdown. We’re looking for your stories, so please contribute to Letters from Cardiff in lockdown!

I went fully freelance for the first time in January 2020. Initially, it was going well – I had a few offers of work (I’m a writer and script editor for TV and Film) and I was beginning to gather a bit of momentum with a few projects and things were on the up. However, when the lockdown was issued, that all stopped.

TV sets and theatres are crowded places with a mixture of people of varying ages who often travel in for work. It would be crazy to keep them open so of course, they shut down. Projects were cancelled or postponed, people lost their jobs, future plans were scrapped and the entire industry just ground to a halt.

My girlfriend, who had moved to London for a new show (she works in the Art Department in Film and TV) and was looking forward to a summer in the city, moved back to Cardiff and we began to prepare for the lockdown.

TV and film is a notoriously fickle industry with short term, freelance contracts with little to no job security. Of course, it’s exciting and creative and interesting but there’s definitely an undercurrent of panic, especially when you’re starting out! The machine carries on, whether you’re on it or not. However, after lockdown, people who were previously constantly busy working 13 hour days had time to assess the situation we were in.

Facebook groups were set up to try to help and advise people who had lost their jobs and try to make sense of what government help they were eligible for (a mix of PAYE and short term freelance contracts makes things complicated). A lot of people aren’t eligible for any help.

Bectu (Broadcasting, Entertainment, Communications and Theatre Union) estimates around 50,000 industry freelancers will have lost their jobs as a result of the pandemic with little to no warning. This uncertainty, mixed with the very real threat COVID-19, made for dark times.

But then, little by little, pockets of positivity began opening up; many theatres and production companies have sprung into action by offering emergency funding pots which people could apply to for money to support them in lieu of lost projects and other charities and popping up. There are also call outs for writers, directors and actors to create monologues and short films, many of which are paid work. The National Theatre is just one of the companies releasing its previous productions online for free.

Industry professionals are holding free or charity-donation-advised masterclasses on Zoom, online workshops are springing up all over. Shows which were previously destined to be on stage are now being acted out online from various different living rooms / kitchens / gardens. I’ve just got work script editing a production which will be written and filmed under social isolation regulations. It seems like the industry which had been flattened by the Indiana-Jones style giant rolling boulder has got over the shock, dusted itself off and is now looking for a different way to the Lost Ark. It’s adapting and it’s learning and it seems more compassionate and giving than ever – I hope that part of it stays.

Apart from all this, my girlfriend and I are just trying to get on with it – it’s just the two of us which makes things a lot easier. Our excellent crossfit gym dropped off equipment to us before lockdown and they run classes twice a day over Zoom.

I’m glad that I can still go out running but I’m keeping runs under an hour and trying to avoid parks and other busy areas, I also go out at quieter times. My running club is doing a virtual relay instead of our weekly meets up.

We’ve done up our garden and I’ve bought a sewing machine and some patterns and I’m giving dressmaking a go (it’s not going super well at the moment but I’m still trying!). Sure, it sucks not being able to see our friends face to face but our situation is a lot better than people who have no garden or live in a crowded space, so we can’t complain. Also, I know people who have lost loved ones to coronavirus which really puts things in perspective.

I’m also feeling more part of a community than I ever have done before. We recently did up our elderly neighbour’s garden because it was a bit of a mess so he wasn’t really able to use it. We did a call out on our local mutual aid Facebook group for flowers and people started turning up with bulbs, seedlings, flowers, pots and in one case, some baby trees!

It was amazing and he was really happy with the results. He’s often out there now, pottering around and enjoying the nice weather we’ve been having. We didn’t want payment but he insisted on us giving six bottles of wine which put a bit of dent in our ‘healthy lockdown living’ due to our utter lack of self control.

Early on, we went out and posted our address and mobile number to everyone on our street in case they needed help while they were self isolating. We’ve done a couple of shopping and prescription runs but most of the texts I get from it are from people offering help. All these people who live on my road and I hardly know any of them!

Through the mutual aid Facebook group I’ve got to know a couple of my neighbours – it seems my street is full of lovely people. Ironic that it takes a lockdown for me to get out and meet my neighbours.

This is a new time for everyone and we’re all just trying to feel our way through it. I’m trying to remain positive but sometimes it really hits me – I’ve got a new little baby niece who was born at the beginning of April. She’s only in London but she may as well be across the other side of the world. I wonder when I’ll get to meet her. I dropped off some essentials at my mum’s house and even though I was only stood at the end of the drive, it felt like there was this big chasm between us. It’s difficult but it’s temporary, and I try to keep that in mind.

Take each day one at a time and be kind.

Jodie Ashdown is a writer who lives in Canton with her girlfriend and too many plants. Jodie is one of this year’s BBC Welsh Voices. Follow Jodie on Twitter @surfingsunshine.

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